a christmas wish list

though i feel safe betting that most people have, unlike me, finished their christmas shopping so late in the game, by smam's suggestion, here is a post about some christmas gifts i would like to receive:
1. regina spektor's new album: begin to hope
2. the office, any/all seasons of the american version
3. books by bill bryson, but i've already received english: the mother tongue
4. the a&e version of pride and prejudice
5. settlers of catan and the expansion pack for 5-6 players
6. postsecret books
7. target gift cards are always appreciated

that's all i'm going to write now. at the moment, i've forgotten most other things i've asked for, though i'm sure i'll be thrilled to remember when i receive them this weekend. (all that to say, if you bought me something and are now worried because i didn't list it here, don't be worried. i'm easy to please... i'm sure i'll love it!) in review, i am not finished with my christmas shopping, and am hoping to invite suggestions from your wish lists by giving you mine. pathetic, i know.
anyhow, i'm headed off to get into the christmas spirit by attending one of my favorite seasonal services at a nearby church. merry christmas.

absolution

yesterday at the geneva HED christmas party, we played a game of sorts, which i won. i received a package that included the following variety of green and white items:

--whitening toothpaste
--whitening gum
--whitening tooth-covering apparatus
--dental floss (the kind that is suspended on a wish-bone like structure)
--gum-pickers
--an electric toothbrush designed for children that has a dolphin on it. my professor commented that it is a "porpoise driven life" toothbrush.

(at this point i started to sense a theme, and got a little self-conscious about my teeth. however, as the game was not rigged, i was forced to conclude that this collection of items was not intended to spur me, personally, on towards better dental hygiene.) the following items were non-tooth related:
--12-pack of sprite
--geneva college watch
and my personal favorite:
--"wash away your sins towlettes." the packaging claims that they are "heavenly scented," "handy, reliable," and contain an "anti-bacterial formula that kills sins on contact." the back of the package gives directions for "righting your wrongs with a wipe!"
1. remove moist towlette
2. devoutly wipe away wrong-doing
3. spot-check for stubborn guilt
4. wipe again as needed
5. discard sins in waste receptacle
6. go forth purified & moisturized

fantastic. i'm saving those for next time i do something really bad. it's kind of like a get-out-of-jail-free card. may you all be so lucky this christmas.

all right, all right, i know

i know i haven't posted. but i have nothing to say. feel free to suggest a topic you're interested in hearing about, and i will consider updating you on the subject. or i might ignore you. i can do what i want. this is my blog.


well, now that i've scared off all my reader(s), i'll sleep better knowing that at least you're not checking back and getting disappointed. happy holidays.